This is My December

2nd of December
1st Monday of 2024
10 am, cloudy skies, kids at school

-morning chores almost done
-dogs fed, laundry in the washer, training songs for our cockatiel is playing in the background
-a bit hungry

I am not really sure what to write as I opened my laptop to do another completely different thing. But I  glanced at the calendar on my desk and saw the name of the 12th day of the month and suddenly had an urge to blog.

Or maybe ramble (as that seems to be what I am doing now). Anyway, i guess it did hit me. That the year is almost over and a thousand things seem to be running through my mind.

The excitement for the upcoming holidays...
The tasks I intend to do around the house...

I guess this longing to still accomplish something productive before the year ends. 

Year 2024 has been good (very grateful). We were fine and blessed throughout the year.
There were challenges but we're still here, stronger, wiser, older  (i prefer mature).

Anyway, December is always special but this month began to have a different meaning to me two years ago because this is the month my mother died. So every December, there's a part of me that goes back to that time when my whole family and I were totally clueless that we will no longer be able to spend Christmas Day with my mother anymore. 

When I look back, I realized I made a lot of mistakes and that I should have done many things differently. But maybe that's how things are supposed to be. Maybe nothing I could have done can ever change the things that happened.

I believe everything is well  now and we know my parents are happy and at peace.

But every December... I will always feel that longing for times that are gone.

Borrowing a line from a song - Just wish that I didn't feel like there was something I missed